I’m not saying it was maliciously intended and that the authors purposefully excluded people from this book. An updated 10th anniversary edition or sequel would be incredible, because with everything that’s happened since 2011, we know things can get better, but we still need to hear it.Īs a reader in 2020, I noticed that the words “non-binary,” “pansexual,” “asexual,” and “intersex” were nowhere to be seen in this text.

Great message, but now (almost 10 years later) some terminology is a bit outdated. How people can come through for you, even, if you give them enough credit and believe they can handle the truth of who you are. And then, tellingly, they discuss how much better and how freeing it is when you're not hiding yourself and your true thoughts from everyone. One theme that keeps coming up is people repeatedly writing that they bullied themselves and punished themselves way more than anyone else ever could, by making vows in their own heads to never tell anyone they were gay, or to never love anyone or do anything that would ever lead to anyone finding out. However, one of the most striking things in these essays is how similar they are, despite being written by people from all different parts of the country, of different ages, backgrounds, and nationalities. It gets better because not only do you have more control over your environment once you're an adult - meaning that you can MOVE AWAY and live in the city, or in a cabin in the woods - but you can have more control over what messages you absorb from family, friends, and our culture.

It gets better by dan savage